"You are the sum total of everything you've ever seen, heard, eaten, smelled, been told, forgot-- it's all there. Everything influences each of us, and because of that I try to make sure that my experiences are positive."
Maya Angelou
No longer living the island life. I sit here writing one
more time for the month of June in the Vancouver airport, amidst mountains on
all sides. A beautiful setting for my soon-to-be destination, the Andes. Everything
feels different. I am not on island time anymore. My writing while on Maui
mostly consisted of the duality of circumstances or people. I believe it is
right to share both sides of the story so that wisdom can come from all
corners. These past few months on Maui have taught me many things, some I have
expressed through written word and others, food for the soul--mine in
particular-- that need not be shared aloud. As with all cover stories and
experiences, there is always the negative that dances with the positive.
Molecular forces on a grand scale. Trillions of ions creating energy powerful
enough to move mountains. Or people through and to mountains, metaphorically
and quite literally. The highlights of my life on Maui have been as such--highlights.
Positive experiences. Happy moments. Sights and occurrences that I presume have
made those following my travels envious and perhaps in want of such outcomes in
life. Not that I set out to cause such emotions in my friends, but I am aware
that my traveling freedom has probably triggered various amounts of desire. And
in so stating, I wanted to write about my negative predicaments, my lost
causes, and my pain. Hopefully, to you my reader, I will not sound haughty in
the end, only learned and humbled having reached this moment in my life.
I love to run. I hate running. I love the free feeling. I
hate the pain in my knees. I’ve run many miles. I injured myself a year ago
causing physical therapy to become daily life for some time. My old injury
flared again while on island. What gave me so much freedom was
gone—intermittently through the course of these past 5 months. Back and forth
my legs gave me trouble, literally, left to right-- each compensating for the
other’s faults. Through hiking. Playing soccer. Running. Knee injuries are the
worst. Traveling somewhere does not put the negative on hold, if anything, it
only emphasizes it, because why should anything go wrong when everything seems
to be going right?
I spent money—a couple hundred dollars actually--- on a new
tattoo. I love him. He’s beautiful and possesses so much meaning for me. Yet,
he is injured, like I was. And for the moment, he is incomplete. Living damply
in the jungle only breeds infection, and so, my beautiful, vibrant, blue
humpback whale fell sick to a staph infection that ate away his color and life.
Ask anyone who saw his degradation, and they can confirm how depressed I was
because of it. He was disappearing under a festering wound. My body was
fighting staph…on my NEW tattoo. Frustrating is an understatement. Hope was not
on my mind for him.
I lost a toenail. The whole thing, not just a chipped nail.
—Well now the count is at two, and hopefully
will stay there. Now, now, before you call me a diva, here me out. I have NEVER
lost a nail. So when I bruised both of my big toes from soccer/dropping ice
chunks on them, please imagine how terrified I was with my recent history of
infection. I COULD NOT—WOULD NOT get another one. So I tended to my new…bodily
detachment. But once you lose one, the second doesn’t seem as bad. Just like a
second child. The first survived, their sibling will too. I just compared
parenthood to toenails. You’re welcome. I’m weird. You’re still reading my
blog.
I had three days before I was finished with my contract on
prop that I had begun in January this year. 3 days. Then I was free to take my
last week on Maui and explore… And a fever set in. Chills and sweats; all night
long. Nausea. Migraine. E coli. Or at least that is what I believe myself to have
contracted. Food sickness. From whatever I am not sure. If you have experienced
such a tummy ache (putting it lightly), you understand what my week consisted
of…but I’ll spare you the TMI details. –We’re getting personal now huh?
Reading this far, you are either probably grossed out by my
problems, feel some sort of sympathy for me or just #smh at my
complaining/explanation.
So I will tie this in. Speak of the duality, as I always do.
Life doesn’t stop because you’re injured or sick. It’s a
wheel as heavy as the giant stone carved by cave men. And life never slows down;
we are always gaining speed with each passing year. The whole kinetic energy
concept. Yes, I spent an incredible five months on Maui, with stories too
numerous to tell within a day or a week for that matter… But I had my peaks and
valleys. My losses and gains. I was emotionally and psychologically healed.
Physically injured…and healed eventually. Back and forth. Dueling charges, but
bonding agents to teach life lessons—both sides of the story. Traveling/being
somewhere exotic and new doesn’t stop the bad from happening. Heartbreak
happens. Lies are told. Relationships torn apart. Knees hurt.
And we keep living. Keep stepping. Striving forward.
Clambering out of the last valley to smell that crisp, mountain breeze at the
summit. Panoramic views of hindsight and lessons. Beauty in the negative and
the healing that comes afterward.
At home or on the road, please, please do not let the
hardships of this life define you or control your actions. Your past hurts are
not your definitions. You define yourself. Chart your own course. Follow it. Go
off course. Learn a little. Learn a lot. Explore the everyday mundane. Take a
leap of faith. Just keep that heart wide open and head held high, your best and
worst days are yet to come.
**The less poetic things I learned while being injured…
Garlic is like magic. Used/eaten raw can help cure so many
different ailments. Look up its chemical properties, it will astound you. Your
breath/body will stink…but you will feel better. Bacteria doesn’t stand a
chance.
REST YOUR INJURIES. We all want to rush around, but we also
need our “island time,” some R&R for the soul. It does a body well to do
nothing every now and then… Remember to RICE yourself: Rest, ice, compression, and
elevation.
Cranberry juice is disgusting…and I’m talking about
concentrated, no filler, un-sweetened, all natural cranberry juice. It’s a
cleanser though, and it will help detach E Coli bacteria from your intestines.
Still TMI Laura…
My whale looks like he went through a battle with a shark…or
at least a zombie. He’s healed, and I am no longer infected. He’s lost color,
and I will need a touch-up. And I have to be patient about that, because my
skin wasn’t healed enough to be worked on again before I departed island…so
until next time Maui…
Your toenails grow back. Don't worry; they just take weeks to do so...
"It's a dangerous business going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don't keep your feet, there's no knowing where you might be swept off to."
Bilbo Baggins
Here's to my next step; it'll be the farthest away from home I've ever been...
